1 00:00:06,339 --> 00:00:09,255 Facebook, Google, and Amazon exploit our data for profit. 2 00:00:09,339 --> 00:00:11,798 I will help you by building an internet of the people 3 00:00:11,881 --> 00:00:13,339 by the people and for the people, 4 00:00:13,422 --> 00:00:14,464 so help me God. 5 00:00:14,547 --> 00:00:15,422 (CHEERING) 6 00:00:16,005 --> 00:00:19,089 You said all that stuff about not collecting user data. 7 00:00:19,172 --> 00:00:20,923 -But I am. -I just lied to Congress. 8 00:00:21,255 --> 00:00:23,339 Hooli will remain an independent entity, 9 00:00:23,422 --> 00:00:25,631 even if we have to shed a few divisions 10 00:00:25,714 --> 00:00:27,297 and trim a little fat. 11 00:00:28,547 --> 00:00:30,422 Gwart has a really good idea, 12 00:00:30,506 --> 00:00:32,506 but she doesn't have a business plan. 13 00:00:32,589 --> 00:00:33,631 Hi, I'm Jared. 14 00:00:34,923 --> 00:00:37,714 We were able to break down all of your misdeeds. 15 00:00:37,798 --> 00:00:39,923 This guy is dirty as a dog, and we got him. 16 00:00:40,130 --> 00:00:41,214 Oh, hell yes. 17 00:00:41,297 --> 00:00:43,589 It's the greatest data aggregating platform. 18 00:00:43,673 --> 00:00:46,547 And Richard developed it specifically for us. 19 00:00:54,339 --> 00:00:56,047 Dinesh: So this morning, Colin cut a new build 20 00:00:56,130 --> 00:00:58,297 of Gates of Galloo to his staging server. 21 00:00:59,756 --> 00:01:02,589 Okay, um, this is Baldereach, 22 00:01:02,673 --> 00:01:04,214 capital city of Galloonia. 23 00:01:04,297 --> 00:01:06,881 Those are some ghoul knights, wearing gelatinous armor. 24 00:01:06,964 --> 00:01:08,881 This is just the game, pretty standard stuff. 25 00:01:08,964 --> 00:01:10,839 Well, until I... 26 00:01:10,923 --> 00:01:12,422 turn on the microphone. 27 00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:14,506 How are you doing, Richard? Are you hungry? 28 00:01:14,589 --> 00:01:17,839 -Would you like some pizza? -(game chimes) 29 00:01:19,297 --> 00:01:21,714 What the fuck? 30 00:01:21,798 --> 00:01:25,339 He's using our API to run ads directly in the game engine? 31 00:01:25,422 --> 00:01:26,798 Gilfoyle: Crazy, right? 32 00:01:26,881 --> 00:01:28,297 Domino's Pizza 33 00:01:28,381 --> 00:01:30,506 in a fantasy medieval universe. 34 00:01:30,589 --> 00:01:33,047 Why, it's enough to make you wanna go on vacation. 35 00:01:33,714 --> 00:01:37,005 Gilfoyle: And he's even using our ability to track sentiment. 36 00:01:37,089 --> 00:01:38,798 Yeah. Even if I say nonsense words, 37 00:01:38,881 --> 00:01:40,673 it assigns them an emotional value. 38 00:01:40,756 --> 00:01:43,214 La-la-la-la-la-la-la! 39 00:01:43,964 --> 00:01:46,047 Richard: Fuck me. So, 40 00:01:46,130 --> 00:01:48,047 unless we get rid of Colin, which we can't, 41 00:01:48,130 --> 00:01:50,631 he is going to put this on our network. 42 00:01:51,339 --> 00:01:53,631 Money just perverts everything. 43 00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:56,214 At this point, I could stand to be a little perverted. 44 00:01:56,297 --> 00:01:57,964 Yeah, I wanna be a lot perverted. 45 00:01:58,047 --> 00:02:01,214 I wanna blow money while it talks to its wife on the phone. 46 00:02:01,297 --> 00:02:02,923 -I wanna suck money-- Oh. -All right. 47 00:02:03,005 --> 00:02:04,964 -Microphone. -Dinesh: Oh! Uh... 48 00:02:05,047 --> 00:02:07,005 Kittens, puppies, United Nations! 49 00:02:07,506 --> 00:02:10,673 (theme music playing) 50 00:02:19,547 --> 00:02:22,255 Richard, is this an okay time? 51 00:02:23,964 --> 00:02:25,339 It's a great time, Jared. 52 00:02:25,422 --> 00:02:29,005 I'm surrounded on all sides by people who turn on me. 53 00:02:29,923 --> 00:02:33,005 -I can come back. -No. No, no, it's fine. 54 00:02:33,089 --> 00:02:35,214 What do you got? 55 00:02:37,923 --> 00:02:39,631 (sighs) What is this? 56 00:02:39,714 --> 00:02:42,255 It's my resignation letter. 57 00:02:44,881 --> 00:02:46,881 I'm leaving. 58 00:02:47,631 --> 00:02:48,881 What? 59 00:02:51,506 --> 00:02:54,214 One gaff with Colin, and you're just gonna walk away? 60 00:02:54,297 --> 00:02:56,089 It's about so much more than that, Richard. 61 00:02:56,172 --> 00:02:58,130 I've been agonizing over this. 62 00:02:58,214 --> 00:03:00,839 Not sleeping, not eating... 63 00:03:01,339 --> 00:03:04,547 I completely forgot my godson's 40th birthday. 64 00:03:04,631 --> 00:03:05,881 Richard, 65 00:03:05,964 --> 00:03:08,756 Pied Piper isn't the same company that I signed up for. 66 00:03:09,255 --> 00:03:11,506 She has different needs now, 67 00:03:11,589 --> 00:03:13,255 and so do you, 68 00:03:13,339 --> 00:03:15,964 and, it turns out, 69 00:03:16,756 --> 00:03:18,297 so do I. 70 00:03:19,589 --> 00:03:21,506 Okay, Jared... 71 00:03:21,589 --> 00:03:23,339 we are in the middle of a shit storm here. 72 00:03:23,422 --> 00:03:26,506 I'm trying to handle this as honestly as possible. 73 00:03:26,589 --> 00:03:28,839 There's a founder at the hacker hostel, 74 00:03:28,923 --> 00:03:31,172 and she needs my help, and... 75 00:03:31,255 --> 00:03:33,005 once I'm free of encumbrances-- 76 00:03:33,089 --> 00:03:35,381 Encumbrances?! Oh! Well, 77 00:03:35,464 --> 00:03:38,422 fuck me, Jared. I don't want to encumber you. 78 00:03:38,506 --> 00:03:40,464 (chuckling) Okay. 79 00:03:40,547 --> 00:03:43,589 Go to your new boss. I hope she's not a... 80 00:03:43,673 --> 00:03:46,297 big of a fuck-up as I am, you... 81 00:03:46,381 --> 00:03:47,547 buddy-fucker. 82 00:03:48,339 --> 00:03:51,547 -I'm not a buddy-fucker. -Oh, yes, you are, Jared. 83 00:03:51,631 --> 00:03:53,381 You are a buddy-fucker. 84 00:03:53,464 --> 00:03:54,964 I am your buddy, 85 00:03:55,047 --> 00:03:57,214 and you are fucking me. Ergo, 86 00:03:57,297 --> 00:03:59,297 you are a buddy-fucker. 87 00:04:01,464 --> 00:04:03,089 Goodbye. 88 00:04:06,506 --> 00:04:09,589 -Richard, I'm not-- -Goodbye, Jared. Thank you. 89 00:04:17,673 --> 00:04:19,172 I like it how it is. 90 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:20,923 But it's too warm. 91 00:04:21,005 --> 00:04:22,798 I want it warm. 92 00:04:24,964 --> 00:04:26,172 (quietly): Okay. 93 00:04:27,130 --> 00:04:29,214 (inhales) 94 00:04:30,673 --> 00:04:32,422 Gentlemen, and lady, 95 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:35,047 a short time ago, I reached out to you and asked you 96 00:04:35,130 --> 00:04:37,839 to invest, sight unseen, in a newer, 97 00:04:37,923 --> 00:04:40,089 leaner, and more focused Hooli. 98 00:04:40,172 --> 00:04:42,756 And invest you did, guided not by 99 00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:45,464 traditional spreadsheets or actuarial tables, 100 00:04:45,547 --> 00:04:47,714 but by your own highly attuned financial-- 101 00:04:47,798 --> 00:04:50,089 Gavin, cut the bullshit. 102 00:04:50,172 --> 00:04:51,381 What do we still own? 103 00:04:51,464 --> 00:04:53,255 Mr. Skelton. 104 00:04:53,339 --> 00:04:55,255 As candid and as forthright as ever. 105 00:04:55,339 --> 00:04:58,297 -Age has not dulled one iota of-- -Gavin. 106 00:04:58,381 --> 00:05:01,214 Of course. I had prepared a presentation, 107 00:05:01,297 --> 00:05:03,130 but I suppose I can just skip to the end. 108 00:05:03,214 --> 00:05:05,339 Hopefully, I won't lose you. (chuckles) 109 00:05:05,422 --> 00:05:07,547 Okay... 110 00:05:08,172 --> 00:05:10,964 Confucius, John Lennon, 111 00:05:11,047 --> 00:05:13,381 Nietzsche, Ayn Rand, 112 00:05:13,464 --> 00:05:15,214 Steve Wonder, and here we go! 113 00:05:15,297 --> 00:05:16,464 As you can see, 114 00:05:16,547 --> 00:05:19,339 among the many jewels still in Hooli's crown 115 00:05:19,422 --> 00:05:22,673 are our exciting suite of office-- 116 00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:24,756 Where is web services? 117 00:05:25,172 --> 00:05:28,547 Well, Mr. Bezos felt it would fold nicely into his AWS, 118 00:05:28,631 --> 00:05:29,631 so he insisted-- 119 00:05:29,714 --> 00:05:31,798 Smart speaker and in-home? 120 00:05:31,881 --> 00:05:35,339 -He took that, too? -HooliHome was, indeed, subsumed 121 00:05:35,422 --> 00:05:37,589 -by the Amazon Alexa-- -Targeted search? 122 00:05:37,673 --> 00:05:40,089 Ironically, also missing. 123 00:05:40,631 --> 00:05:42,881 But we maintain rights to the HooliPhone 124 00:05:42,964 --> 00:05:44,089 and its proprietary apps, 125 00:05:44,172 --> 00:05:47,214 the patent for the Hooli Puck Mouse. 126 00:05:47,297 --> 00:05:49,964 We also maintain our web-based marketplaces, 127 00:05:50,047 --> 00:05:53,923 including our up-and-coming lifestyle networking platform, 128 00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:57,214 -Foxhole. -What the fuck is that?! 129 00:05:57,297 --> 00:06:00,547 Well, Foxhole is a very exciting 130 00:06:00,631 --> 00:06:03,839 web-based exchange, catering to those in the military, 131 00:06:03,923 --> 00:06:07,547 -who are interested in having extramarital affairs. -Skelton: Gavin, 132 00:06:07,631 --> 00:06:10,881 when do you expect the eight of us will 133 00:06:10,964 --> 00:06:13,047 recoup our investment? 134 00:06:13,130 --> 00:06:15,673 Ah, yes! That's my very next slide. 135 00:06:15,756 --> 00:06:17,631 -After this one. -(clicks) 136 00:06:19,547 --> 00:06:20,923 Well, with a little luck, 137 00:06:21,005 --> 00:06:25,047 we'll be profitable and up 5X inside three years. 138 00:06:25,130 --> 00:06:28,631 You got three months, or you're out. 139 00:06:30,381 --> 00:06:32,547 So, Melanie will take on all of Jared's 140 00:06:32,631 --> 00:06:34,589 marketing duties, Gwen will cover biz dev, 141 00:06:34,673 --> 00:06:37,005 and that should take care of it. 142 00:06:37,089 --> 00:06:38,255 Does this scan to you? 143 00:06:38,339 --> 00:06:40,214 -I can see it. -Okay, great. 144 00:06:40,297 --> 00:06:43,005 -Richard: Okay, back to work. -Tracy: Uh, Bertram, 145 00:06:43,089 --> 00:06:45,089 while I have you... 146 00:06:45,631 --> 00:06:47,464 You don't have me. 147 00:06:47,547 --> 00:06:50,422 Richard's just tasked me with streamlining productivity 148 00:06:50,506 --> 00:06:51,881 and balancing headcount. 149 00:06:51,964 --> 00:06:53,714 Can you explain to me why you have 150 00:06:53,798 --> 00:06:55,547 no one working under you? 151 00:06:55,631 --> 00:06:58,798 It just seems odd considering that the agile board is showing 152 00:06:58,881 --> 00:07:00,756 that you have a massive backlog. 153 00:07:00,839 --> 00:07:02,339 You're new here, 154 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:04,964 so I'll forgive the patronizing tone. 155 00:07:05,255 --> 00:07:07,589 I'm more concerned with being right 156 00:07:07,673 --> 00:07:09,422 than being fast, 157 00:07:09,506 --> 00:07:13,089 and I don't like dealing with people. To wit, 158 00:07:13,172 --> 00:07:15,214 -are we done? -Oh, 159 00:07:15,297 --> 00:07:16,547 you're "that guy." 160 00:07:16,631 --> 00:07:18,673 What "guy" exactly? 161 00:07:18,756 --> 00:07:21,047 The brooding, arrogant guy 162 00:07:21,130 --> 00:07:23,047 who refuses to take orders? 163 00:07:23,130 --> 00:07:24,964 Self-taught coder who looks down on 164 00:07:25,047 --> 00:07:26,839 anyone who's taken a class. 165 00:07:26,923 --> 00:07:28,714 You're probably an atheist 166 00:07:28,798 --> 00:07:30,923 or something more contrarian. 167 00:07:31,005 --> 00:07:33,464 You claim to be an anarcho-capitalist, 168 00:07:33,547 --> 00:07:35,631 but you work here and pay taxes. 169 00:07:35,714 --> 00:07:39,631 You've probably read half of Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon, 170 00:07:39,714 --> 00:07:42,798 and it's about 50/50 whether you own a snake. 171 00:07:42,881 --> 00:07:45,714 (whispers): His girlfriend owns a snake. 172 00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:47,422 I finished Cryptonomicon, 173 00:07:47,506 --> 00:07:50,339 and you easily could've just looked in my file. 174 00:07:50,422 --> 00:07:51,839 I didn't need to. 175 00:07:51,923 --> 00:07:54,923 -I'm assigning you five coders. -Inadvisable. 176 00:07:55,005 --> 00:07:56,339 Noted. 177 00:07:56,422 --> 00:07:58,089 I'll send them over first thing tomorrow. 178 00:07:58,172 --> 00:08:00,297 If you're going to throw five randoms under me, 179 00:08:00,381 --> 00:08:02,506 at least let me pick my team. 180 00:08:03,214 --> 00:08:05,005 -Fair enough. -Good. 181 00:08:05,547 --> 00:08:07,130 -Denpok: Georgia? -Mm. 182 00:08:07,214 --> 00:08:11,005 You want to move the entire company to Georgia? 183 00:08:11,089 --> 00:08:14,464 -Why? -Well, the Valley's become prohibitively expensive. 184 00:08:14,547 --> 00:08:16,005 Look at these numbers. 185 00:08:16,089 --> 00:08:17,631 If we move to Georgia, 186 00:08:17,714 --> 00:08:20,339 we can save a fortune and get a further investment. 187 00:08:20,422 --> 00:08:21,464 It's the only way. 188 00:08:21,547 --> 00:08:23,714 Well, I have heard good things about 189 00:08:23,798 --> 00:08:25,881 the food scene in the Dirty South. 190 00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:27,839 Stankonia. Freaknik. 191 00:08:27,923 --> 00:08:30,547 -Might be nice to be around more people of color. -Gavin: What? 192 00:08:30,631 --> 00:08:32,422 Not Atlanta. 193 00:08:32,506 --> 00:08:36,172 Tbilisi. The country of Georgia, not the state. 194 00:08:36,255 --> 00:08:37,464 What? 195 00:08:39,089 --> 00:08:40,297 -Denpok: Gavin? -Hmm? 196 00:08:40,381 --> 00:08:43,798 Tbilisi is no doubt a wonderfully rustic place, 197 00:08:43,881 --> 00:08:47,130 but do you not fear losing a local presence, 198 00:08:47,214 --> 00:08:49,714 a connection with the beating heart of 199 00:08:49,798 --> 00:08:51,673 the technology industry? 200 00:08:51,756 --> 00:08:53,714 Hoover: Boots on the ground, so to speak. 201 00:08:53,798 --> 00:08:55,964 I think it's wise, sir. 202 00:08:57,923 --> 00:09:00,047 Shit. You're right. 203 00:09:00,506 --> 00:09:03,089 I need to be here to maintain my relevance. 204 00:09:03,464 --> 00:09:05,214 All right then. Plan B. 205 00:09:05,297 --> 00:09:08,547 You two and the team will move to Belarus. 206 00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:12,214 If we can get close enough to the Chernobyl exclusion zone, 207 00:09:12,297 --> 00:09:13,589 it's a buyer's market, 208 00:09:13,673 --> 00:09:15,798 and with the money we save from substantially 209 00:09:15,881 --> 00:09:17,297 downgrading from Tbilisi, 210 00:09:17,381 --> 00:09:19,839 plus the bigger Belarusian investment we've been offered, 211 00:09:19,923 --> 00:09:22,589 I'll maintain a pied-à-terre here in town. 212 00:09:22,673 --> 00:09:25,422 Now, I'll need to rely much more heavily on you 213 00:09:25,506 --> 00:09:28,089 because you probably won't see me much. 214 00:09:28,172 --> 00:09:30,005 I'll need you to guide the troops 215 00:09:30,089 --> 00:09:31,547 and bridge the language gap, 216 00:09:31,631 --> 00:09:33,214 but... 217 00:09:33,297 --> 00:09:35,172 God damn, 218 00:09:35,255 --> 00:09:37,798 I respect the hell out of you both. 219 00:09:42,422 --> 00:09:44,464 ♪ ♪ 220 00:09:45,089 --> 00:09:48,422 -Monica: Are you sure about this? -(clears throat) Uh... 221 00:09:48,798 --> 00:09:50,255 Yeah. Yeah, no. 222 00:09:50,339 --> 00:09:53,589 We can't have that atrocious game anywhere on our network. 223 00:09:53,673 --> 00:09:55,214 -We have to do a raise. -Well, 224 00:09:55,297 --> 00:09:58,005 it's a terrible time to do it, but... 225 00:09:58,839 --> 00:10:00,255 I mean, it's your call. 226 00:10:00,339 --> 00:10:02,089 It's gonna have to be a big number though. 227 00:10:02,172 --> 00:10:03,464 Yeah, good. 228 00:10:03,547 --> 00:10:05,631 I guess we should set up some meetings, yeah? 229 00:10:05,714 --> 00:10:08,964 Monica: Too time-consuming. Let's jump-start the process. 230 00:10:09,631 --> 00:10:11,673 Are you feeling charitable? 231 00:10:11,756 --> 00:10:14,172 Just 39 cents a day can literally 232 00:10:14,255 --> 00:10:16,631 feed an entire family like this. 233 00:10:16,714 --> 00:10:18,839 Think about it, then ask yourself... 234 00:10:18,923 --> 00:10:21,881 - (noisy chattering) - (mellow jazz playing) 235 00:10:22,673 --> 00:10:25,589 All right, so this place is the who's who of VCs, 236 00:10:25,673 --> 00:10:27,756 so let's do a lap, take inventory, 237 00:10:27,839 --> 00:10:30,839 and we'll start with the biggest firm, work our way down to-- 238 00:10:30,923 --> 00:10:33,631 -Laurie! -Monica. Richard. 239 00:10:33,714 --> 00:10:35,422 What are you doing here? 240 00:10:36,005 --> 00:10:38,130 The same as you, I suppose. 241 00:10:38,214 --> 00:10:40,339 Eating caviar and... 242 00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:41,547 hacking famine. 243 00:10:41,631 --> 00:10:44,714 -No, I thought you moved to China. -Mm. 244 00:10:45,214 --> 00:10:47,673 The interesting thing about moving, Monica, 245 00:10:47,756 --> 00:10:50,964 is that you can do it more than once. I am back. 246 00:10:51,047 --> 00:10:53,130 You may be intrigued to know 247 00:10:53,214 --> 00:10:56,756 that I have severed ties with Yao and YaoNet. 248 00:10:57,214 --> 00:10:58,923 So, you're going back to VC? 249 00:10:59,005 --> 00:11:00,381 Oh, no. 250 00:11:00,881 --> 00:11:02,506 You misunderstand. 251 00:11:02,589 --> 00:11:05,923 I have severed ties between Yao and YaoNet. 252 00:11:06,005 --> 00:11:08,172 Yao has been exited, and I have made myself 253 00:11:08,255 --> 00:11:09,422 the CEO of the company, 254 00:11:09,506 --> 00:11:11,714 which I am moving back to the US, 255 00:11:11,798 --> 00:11:15,381 and in order to make it sound more American, 256 00:11:15,464 --> 00:11:16,881 I am renaming it 257 00:11:16,964 --> 00:11:18,506 "YaoNetUS." 258 00:11:18,589 --> 00:11:20,714 Wait. So, you're launching here? 259 00:11:20,798 --> 00:11:23,130 Yes, and with those Chinese out of the way, 260 00:11:23,214 --> 00:11:25,839 I can finally be more ruthlessly efficient. 261 00:11:25,923 --> 00:11:27,089 Speaking of, 262 00:11:27,172 --> 00:11:28,756 excuse me. 263 00:11:31,130 --> 00:11:33,589 -What? Are you fucking kidding me? -Richard, 264 00:11:33,673 --> 00:11:36,172 relax, okay, she's got inferior tech, 265 00:11:36,255 --> 00:11:37,798 she's got no developers. You remember when 266 00:11:37,881 --> 00:11:41,255 she tried to run Eklow? She's gonna last a week as CEO. 267 00:11:41,339 --> 00:11:43,673 I mean, look at her. She's desperate. 268 00:11:43,756 --> 00:11:45,381 She's already in total flirt mode. 269 00:11:45,464 --> 00:11:47,255 I do believe with proper management... 270 00:11:47,339 --> 00:11:49,005 Monica: She needs money just like we do. 271 00:11:49,089 --> 00:11:51,255 Let's just worry about us, okay? 272 00:11:51,339 --> 00:11:54,130 I will introduce you, and just... 273 00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:56,297 let me do the talking, okay? 274 00:11:56,381 --> 00:11:57,589 Don't speak until-- 275 00:11:57,673 --> 00:11:59,297 Richard Hendricks from Pied Piper. 276 00:11:59,381 --> 00:12:01,881 -Eric Rivera, Graves Partners. -Richard: Oh. 277 00:12:01,964 --> 00:12:03,923 I saw your congressional testimony, 278 00:12:04,005 --> 00:12:05,381 and I thought, man, 279 00:12:05,464 --> 00:12:07,381 I really need to talk to that guy. 280 00:12:07,464 --> 00:12:09,047 Oh, you did? Huh, cool. 281 00:12:09,130 --> 00:12:11,172 Yeah. I mean, you committed 282 00:12:11,255 --> 00:12:13,464 to a really bad business model, 283 00:12:13,547 --> 00:12:15,297 on national TV. 284 00:12:15,381 --> 00:12:16,881 I guess I just wanted to know, 285 00:12:16,964 --> 00:12:18,506 what the hell were you thinking? 286 00:12:18,589 --> 00:12:20,297 I mean, picking a fight with Facebook is one thing, 287 00:12:20,381 --> 00:12:22,964 but shitting on Google and Amazon at the same time, 288 00:12:23,047 --> 00:12:26,047 in front of TV cameras? What was going on in your brain? 289 00:12:26,130 --> 00:12:28,297 And-and Hooli. I-I shit on them, too, so... 290 00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:30,464 I mean, we're all sitting in front of the TV in our office, 291 00:12:30,547 --> 00:12:33,255 thinking this is the dumbest man in tech. 292 00:12:33,339 --> 00:12:35,214 And then we talked about it, and we realized, hang on, 293 00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:37,422 -that is totally unfair. -Yeah, you did? Good. 294 00:12:37,506 --> 00:12:40,506 Yeah, because, I mean, you were subpoenaed, right? You were under oath? 295 00:12:40,589 --> 00:12:43,297 -What were you supposed to do? -Technically, I don't... 296 00:12:43,381 --> 00:12:45,714 You weren't... you weren't under oath? 297 00:12:45,798 --> 00:12:47,172 Mm, I don't think so. 298 00:12:47,255 --> 00:12:48,631 Are you kidding me? 299 00:12:48,714 --> 00:12:51,047 Wait. Karl, Ben! Come over here. You gotta hear this. 300 00:12:51,130 --> 00:12:53,589 We were wrong, man! Tell them what you just told me. 301 00:12:53,673 --> 00:12:56,339 (chattering) 302 00:12:57,756 --> 00:12:59,089 Hey, um-- 303 00:12:59,172 --> 00:13:01,130 Richard Hendricks, from Pied Piper, yes? 304 00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:02,255 Uh, no. 305 00:13:02,339 --> 00:13:04,839 Maximo Reyes. I am an investor from Chile. 306 00:13:05,214 --> 00:13:07,839 Wow, I gotta tell you, it is an honor to meet you, man. 307 00:13:07,923 --> 00:13:10,631 Truly, I am such a big fan of your technology. 308 00:13:10,714 --> 00:13:12,297 Wow. 309 00:13:12,381 --> 00:13:15,339 -What, like, really, or... -Of course. Hi. 310 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:18,756 We are shaking hands. 311 00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:20,130 Correct? 312 00:13:20,214 --> 00:13:22,297 But I'm sure you have more important people to talk to, 313 00:13:22,381 --> 00:13:24,297 you know, and, you have made it painfully clear 314 00:13:24,381 --> 00:13:26,047 that you do not want me as an investor, so-- 315 00:13:26,130 --> 00:13:29,297 No, h-hold on. Wait, I-I-I made it clear? When did I-- 316 00:13:29,381 --> 00:13:31,214 Oh no, not you personally, but I spoke with somebody 317 00:13:31,297 --> 00:13:32,631 from your company many times. 318 00:13:32,714 --> 00:13:33,923 Uh, Yarez? 319 00:13:34,005 --> 00:13:35,047 Yarez? 320 00:13:35,130 --> 00:13:36,798 Y-Yarez Dun... 321 00:13:36,881 --> 00:13:38,172 Yarez-- Oh! 322 00:13:38,255 --> 00:13:39,839 -Jared. -Yes! 323 00:13:39,923 --> 00:13:41,422 -Whatever... -Potatoes, potatoes. 324 00:13:41,506 --> 00:13:45,130 Well, uh, Yared doesn't really work with us anymore, so... 325 00:13:45,214 --> 00:13:47,714 -Oh, wow. Well, then. -Yeah. 326 00:13:47,798 --> 00:13:49,297 Look at you and me. 327 00:13:49,381 --> 00:13:51,255 -We are talking. -(laughs) 328 00:13:51,339 --> 00:13:53,798 Have you ever had a Chilean terremoto ? 329 00:13:53,881 --> 00:13:56,339 -Hoover: Denpok, got a minute? -Denpok: Yes. 330 00:13:56,422 --> 00:13:59,714 I may have a way to keep us here in the US. 331 00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:02,422 Talk. 332 00:14:02,881 --> 00:14:04,756 Are you familiar with CIFIUS? 333 00:14:05,339 --> 00:14:06,714 Yes. 334 00:14:07,297 --> 00:14:08,381 No. 335 00:14:08,464 --> 00:14:11,255 The Committee on Foreign Investment in the US, 336 00:14:11,339 --> 00:14:12,798 or CIFIUS, 337 00:14:12,881 --> 00:14:16,005 is a federal agency that has wide latitude 338 00:14:16,089 --> 00:14:17,673 to prevent American companies 339 00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:19,172 -from doing business with foreigners, 340 00:14:19,255 --> 00:14:21,839 if there's a national security threat. 341 00:14:21,923 --> 00:14:24,589 Are you familiar with the dating app Grindr? 342 00:14:24,673 --> 00:14:26,047 No. 343 00:14:27,964 --> 00:14:29,089 Yes. 344 00:14:29,673 --> 00:14:32,339 Last year, CIFIUS reversed the sale 345 00:14:32,422 --> 00:14:34,756 of Grindr to Chinese investors. 346 00:14:34,839 --> 00:14:38,506 They ruled that the sexual and HIV status of US citizens 347 00:14:38,589 --> 00:14:40,005 was something they needed to keep 348 00:14:40,089 --> 00:14:42,422 out of the hands of foreign interests. 349 00:14:42,798 --> 00:14:44,714 -I understand. -This morning, 350 00:14:44,798 --> 00:14:47,255 I was on the user database of Foxhole, 351 00:14:47,339 --> 00:14:49,589 when I happened upon a familiar face. 352 00:14:52,005 --> 00:14:53,005 (clicks) 353 00:14:53,089 --> 00:14:56,297 Four-star General Hanley Barris. 354 00:14:56,673 --> 00:14:58,547 That is not his face. 355 00:14:58,631 --> 00:15:00,089 No, it is not. 356 00:15:00,172 --> 00:15:03,464 But as a four-star general, 357 00:15:03,547 --> 00:15:06,005 he could anonymously compel CIFIUS 358 00:15:06,089 --> 00:15:09,214 to prevent Foxhole or its ownership 359 00:15:09,297 --> 00:15:10,756 from moving to foreign soil. 360 00:15:12,631 --> 00:15:13,923 No more Belarus? 361 00:15:14,005 --> 00:15:17,047 I think General Barris would be very keen to keep 362 00:15:17,130 --> 00:15:19,547 this type of material out of the hands of 363 00:15:19,631 --> 00:15:21,964 foreign interests, and by that, 364 00:15:22,047 --> 00:15:25,005 I mean his wife, Yekatarina. 365 00:15:26,839 --> 00:15:29,214 ♪ ♪ 366 00:15:29,297 --> 00:15:32,589 Hey! What happened to you last night? 367 00:15:32,673 --> 00:15:35,756 Oh my God, you reek of booze. 368 00:15:35,839 --> 00:15:37,339 Were you out all night? 369 00:15:37,422 --> 00:15:39,005 Monica... 370 00:15:39,714 --> 00:15:41,923 -I got lucky. -Didn't need to know that. 371 00:15:42,005 --> 00:15:44,673 No, no, I got even luckier than that. 372 00:15:45,130 --> 00:15:48,881 Tell me, did you know that the national tree of Chile 373 00:15:48,964 --> 00:15:50,506 is the piñoner ? 374 00:15:50,589 --> 00:15:52,005 Also this, 375 00:15:52,089 --> 00:15:54,673 -do you know who Maximo Reyes is? -Yeah. 376 00:15:54,756 --> 00:15:58,214 The richest man in Chile. Well, I saw that very tree 377 00:15:58,297 --> 00:16:00,422 in the middle of his living room, 378 00:16:00,506 --> 00:16:02,839 and he let me climb it. 379 00:16:04,089 --> 00:16:06,464 You met Maximo Reyes 380 00:16:06,547 --> 00:16:08,339 and you went to his house? 381 00:16:08,422 --> 00:16:10,798 Yeah, and he showed me his art collection, 382 00:16:10,881 --> 00:16:13,589 and we drank a number of terremotos, 383 00:16:13,673 --> 00:16:16,714 which are... fucking disgusting. 384 00:16:16,798 --> 00:16:19,464 Anyway, I may have convinced him 385 00:16:19,547 --> 00:16:22,005 to give us enough money 386 00:16:22,631 --> 00:16:24,589 to get rid of Colin. 387 00:16:24,673 --> 00:16:25,923 Wait, what? 388 00:16:26,005 --> 00:16:28,130 I casually floated 50 million, 389 00:16:28,214 --> 00:16:29,756 and he didn't even bat an eye. 390 00:16:29,839 --> 00:16:31,547 -(chuckling) -Monica: Richard... 391 00:16:32,798 --> 00:16:35,297 There's a reason Jared tried to ditch this guy. 392 00:16:35,381 --> 00:16:37,923 -We cannot take his money. -Why not? 393 00:16:38,005 --> 00:16:40,506 Did he tell you where he gets it from? 394 00:16:40,714 --> 00:16:45,214 How his grandfather was the chief of secret police under Pinochet? 395 00:16:45,297 --> 00:16:46,547 About how they ran their mines? 396 00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:48,631 They were basically slave traders. 397 00:16:48,714 --> 00:16:51,464 He can't really be all that bad. 398 00:16:51,547 --> 00:16:55,005 I mean, he really, really likes Pied Piper. 399 00:16:55,089 --> 00:16:57,255 Look, we cannot take blood money. 400 00:16:57,339 --> 00:16:58,839 You thought selling ads were bad? 401 00:16:58,923 --> 00:17:01,923 These guys executed people in soccer stadiums. 402 00:17:02,005 --> 00:17:03,964 I was open to it at first, 403 00:17:04,047 --> 00:17:06,714 but Jared was adamant and he's right. 404 00:17:06,798 --> 00:17:10,756 Fifty million sounds great, but it's an awfully low price to pay for your integrity. 405 00:17:11,631 --> 00:17:12,714 Fuck. 406 00:17:12,798 --> 00:17:14,005 Look, 407 00:17:14,089 --> 00:17:15,964 I know Colin is a sleazebag, 408 00:17:16,047 --> 00:17:17,673 but at least he's temporary. 409 00:17:17,756 --> 00:17:19,798 Okay, Maximo is a thousand times worse, 410 00:17:19,881 --> 00:17:21,631 and he would be permanent. 411 00:17:22,422 --> 00:17:24,381 (phone chimes) 412 00:17:26,005 --> 00:17:27,589 (scoffs) Of course. 413 00:17:27,673 --> 00:17:29,839 He just e-mailed me the term sheet. 414 00:17:29,923 --> 00:17:31,339 I don't even wanna look at him. 415 00:17:31,422 --> 00:17:33,214 Just forward it to me. 416 00:17:33,297 --> 00:17:35,547 -I'll take care of it. -Thanks. 417 00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:38,381 I know that this sucks, but I promise you, 418 00:17:38,464 --> 00:17:40,047 you're doing the right... 419 00:17:40,130 --> 00:17:41,839 Fifty million? 420 00:17:41,923 --> 00:17:44,714 Do you remember when I was offered 10? 421 00:17:44,798 --> 00:17:46,589 -(laughs) -Richard. 422 00:17:46,673 --> 00:17:48,339 Hmm? 423 00:17:50,005 --> 00:17:51,839 It's not $50 million. 424 00:17:52,798 --> 00:17:54,130 Is it more? 425 00:17:55,798 --> 00:17:57,964 It's a billion, Richard. 426 00:18:01,172 --> 00:18:03,214 A what? 427 00:18:03,798 --> 00:18:07,839 He just offered us a billion dollars for 10%. 428 00:18:08,714 --> 00:18:10,089 Fuck. 429 00:18:14,047 --> 00:18:17,005 -(exhales) -You're already holding a cigarette. 430 00:18:17,673 --> 00:18:19,839 ♪ ♪ 431 00:18:19,923 --> 00:18:21,464 Tracy: Mr. Gilfoyle! 432 00:18:21,547 --> 00:18:24,714 -Gilfoyle: Yes, ma'am? -Is this your new team? 433 00:18:25,881 --> 00:18:27,255 It is. 434 00:18:27,339 --> 00:18:29,464 Five people, as you requested. 435 00:18:29,547 --> 00:18:32,631 -That man over there? -Gilfoyle: Ken. 436 00:18:33,214 --> 00:18:36,464 -Isn't he the coffee guy? -Barista. Yes. 437 00:18:36,923 --> 00:18:39,756 And Joyce was watering the plants. 438 00:18:39,839 --> 00:18:41,255 Mona was working security. 439 00:18:41,339 --> 00:18:44,422 Dan and George, they were painting the lobby. 440 00:18:44,506 --> 00:18:45,589 Until today. 441 00:18:45,673 --> 00:18:47,506 Which reminds me, they all need to change 442 00:18:47,589 --> 00:18:49,673 their LinkedIn status to... 443 00:18:49,756 --> 00:18:52,214 "placaters of middle management." 444 00:18:52,547 --> 00:18:55,130 I'll be honest, this is sort of a first. 445 00:18:55,214 --> 00:18:57,631 And here you thought I was just... 446 00:18:57,714 --> 00:18:59,089 "that guy." 447 00:18:59,673 --> 00:19:01,255 You know, Mr. Gilfoyle, you're right. 448 00:19:01,339 --> 00:19:02,839 You're not "that guy," 449 00:19:02,923 --> 00:19:05,964 because at the seven companies I've helped take public, 450 00:19:06,047 --> 00:19:09,005 every other "that guy" accepted their limitations, 451 00:19:09,089 --> 00:19:11,297 took on a team, and managed to get their work done. 452 00:19:11,381 --> 00:19:13,464 Some of them are now billionaires. 453 00:19:13,547 --> 00:19:15,130 None of them would've gotten into 454 00:19:15,214 --> 00:19:17,255 a dick-measuring contest with HR 455 00:19:17,339 --> 00:19:18,964 when they were two weeks behind. 456 00:19:19,047 --> 00:19:20,464 So, lucky us, 457 00:19:20,547 --> 00:19:22,506 I guess you're unique. 458 00:19:22,589 --> 00:19:24,964 ♪ ♪ 459 00:19:25,756 --> 00:19:27,798 You know, Gilfoyle, when I first heard the phrase 460 00:19:27,881 --> 00:19:30,089 "dick-measuring contest," I thought it was a contest 461 00:19:30,172 --> 00:19:32,005 to see who could measure the most dicks. 462 00:19:32,089 --> 00:19:33,631 But it isn't, 463 00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:35,381 is it, Gilfoyle? 464 00:19:35,464 --> 00:19:37,130 Is it a typo? Maybe it's a typo. 465 00:19:37,214 --> 00:19:40,130 It's not a typo, Richard. It's spelled out in the offer. 466 00:19:40,214 --> 00:19:43,255 One billion dollars, in one lump sum. 467 00:19:43,339 --> 00:19:45,464 Okay, what do I do? 468 00:19:47,589 --> 00:19:49,422 -I don't know. -Oh. Okay, well, 469 00:19:49,506 --> 00:19:51,923 Jared had you pretty convinced that this was evil money. 470 00:19:52,005 --> 00:19:53,756 It's a billion fucking dollars, Richard! 471 00:19:53,839 --> 00:19:56,339 Okay, so does that make this less evil or, like, 472 00:19:56,422 --> 00:19:58,172 -way more evil? -Ack! 473 00:19:58,255 --> 00:19:59,547 Do not touch. 474 00:19:59,631 --> 00:20:02,297 It's an e-sign. You touch that button, it's over. 475 00:20:02,381 --> 00:20:03,964 Tell me what to do. 476 00:20:04,047 --> 00:20:05,798 Monica, this is your job! 477 00:20:05,881 --> 00:20:07,547 Look, when my sister 478 00:20:07,631 --> 00:20:11,005 got pregnant her freshman year of college, I said get an abortion. 479 00:20:11,089 --> 00:20:15,130 Well, now my niece, Dakota, who is very much with us, 480 00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:17,881 calls me "Aunt Abortion." 481 00:20:17,964 --> 00:20:19,339 I'm sorry. 482 00:20:19,422 --> 00:20:22,214 You are the CEO, this is on you. 483 00:20:22,297 --> 00:20:24,506 Well, I gotta talk to Dinesh and Gilfoyle. 484 00:20:24,589 --> 00:20:26,005 No, you can't talk to those animals! 485 00:20:26,089 --> 00:20:28,005 You say a word to anyone out there, 486 00:20:28,089 --> 00:20:31,756 and this whole company turns into Lord of the Flies in five seconds. 487 00:20:31,839 --> 00:20:34,339 It's a billion dollars, Richard. 488 00:20:34,923 --> 00:20:36,422 I'm sorry. You're on your own. 489 00:20:36,506 --> 00:20:37,964 Monica... 490 00:20:39,589 --> 00:20:41,506 Richard, there is a major emergency. 491 00:20:41,589 --> 00:20:44,047 Gilfoyle is using the barista as one of the coders, 492 00:20:44,130 --> 00:20:46,339 so I tried to use the cappuccino machine on my own, 493 00:20:46,422 --> 00:20:49,130 and I don't know if, like, the frother knob is, like, 494 00:20:49,214 --> 00:20:50,506 jammed or something, 495 00:20:50,589 --> 00:20:52,214 but it's, like, not working. 496 00:20:52,297 --> 00:20:54,381 So, there is no froth, 497 00:20:54,464 --> 00:20:57,464 at all, for anybody. 498 00:20:58,047 --> 00:21:00,005 So, can you get on that? 499 00:21:00,089 --> 00:21:01,923 -Yeah. -Okay, great. 500 00:21:02,005 --> 00:21:03,714 -He's on it! -(sighs) 501 00:21:03,798 --> 00:21:06,756 It's really a shit sandwich. 502 00:21:07,214 --> 00:21:09,255 They've been in there for a while. 503 00:21:09,339 --> 00:21:11,130 -Wonder how it's going. -(door opens) 504 00:21:12,714 --> 00:21:14,881 General Barris. Is it done? 505 00:21:16,506 --> 00:21:19,339 -Wonderful. -Say hello to your wife for me. 506 00:21:20,255 --> 00:21:22,964 Gavin! How was the meeting? 507 00:21:25,923 --> 00:21:28,297 -(shouts) -(clatters) 508 00:21:29,798 --> 00:21:32,673 ♪ ♪ 509 00:21:34,673 --> 00:21:36,339 Gavin: Aah! Fuck! 510 00:21:42,714 --> 00:21:44,381 Richard? 511 00:21:44,464 --> 00:21:46,631 Huh? Yeah. 512 00:21:46,714 --> 00:21:48,297 What are you doing here? 513 00:21:48,381 --> 00:21:50,673 (clears throat) Do you have a second? 514 00:21:50,756 --> 00:21:53,381 Yeah, yeah. Come on in. 515 00:21:53,756 --> 00:21:55,839 I know you tried to keep Maximo away from me, 516 00:21:55,923 --> 00:21:58,464 but one thing lead to another and-and now this. 517 00:21:58,547 --> 00:22:01,464 -That is quite an offer. -Yeah. 518 00:22:01,547 --> 00:22:04,339 So, what do I do? 519 00:22:04,422 --> 00:22:07,297 Look, Richard, I know you said Monica's checked out on this, 520 00:22:07,381 --> 00:22:11,798 but... this is kind of a monumental Pied Piper matter. 521 00:22:11,881 --> 00:22:15,756 I think you should get advice from somebody within the company. 522 00:22:15,839 --> 00:22:18,130 That's why I'm here, Jared. 523 00:22:18,214 --> 00:22:19,172 That's you. 524 00:22:19,255 --> 00:22:20,798 You gotta come back. 525 00:22:20,881 --> 00:22:22,673 -Richard-- -I-I know 526 00:22:22,756 --> 00:22:25,172 your job changed over time, 527 00:22:25,255 --> 00:22:26,923 but we can undo that. 528 00:22:27,005 --> 00:22:28,339 You know, restructure your role, 529 00:22:28,422 --> 00:22:30,381 move you upstairs so you're closer to me. 530 00:22:30,464 --> 00:22:31,881 Whatever it takes to make it work. 531 00:22:31,964 --> 00:22:34,005 Come on, think about it. We'll be... 532 00:22:34,089 --> 00:22:35,547 a pair of boys, back in business. 533 00:22:35,631 --> 00:22:38,339 Richard, it's too late. I mean, 534 00:22:38,422 --> 00:22:40,464 you know, you let me go, so I took the job here 535 00:22:40,547 --> 00:22:42,714 -with Gwart, and-- -So? 536 00:22:42,798 --> 00:22:45,673 Go inside and tell Gwart you're leaving. 537 00:22:45,756 --> 00:22:47,839 Well, that's not how loyalty works. 538 00:22:47,923 --> 00:22:49,422 I mean, that wouldn't be fair. 539 00:22:49,506 --> 00:22:51,130 Fair? 540 00:22:52,798 --> 00:22:55,005 Years ago, you came to this house, 541 00:22:55,089 --> 00:22:57,547 begging me for a job, and I gave you one. 542 00:22:57,631 --> 00:23:00,839 In fact, I made you COO. And now, 543 00:23:00,923 --> 00:23:03,798 when I need you the most, you stab me in the back, 544 00:23:03,881 --> 00:23:06,923 and you have the balls to lecture me about loyalty? 545 00:23:07,005 --> 00:23:09,464 Are you fucking kidding me? 546 00:23:09,547 --> 00:23:10,714 I was right. 547 00:23:10,798 --> 00:23:12,673 You are a buddy-fucker. 548 00:23:13,547 --> 00:23:16,047 -Please stop saying that. -Buddy-fucker. 549 00:23:16,130 --> 00:23:17,547 Stop saying that. 550 00:23:17,631 --> 00:23:19,839 And-and-and please just leave this house, 551 00:23:19,923 --> 00:23:23,214 -or I can't be held responsible for my behavior. -Oh yeah? 552 00:23:23,297 --> 00:23:25,214 What are you gonna do, Jared? Huh? 553 00:23:25,297 --> 00:23:27,381 You gonna buddy-fuck me? 'Cause that's what you do 554 00:23:27,464 --> 00:23:30,130 -to your buddies now, isn't it? -Get out. 555 00:23:30,214 --> 00:23:31,547 (buzzing) 556 00:23:31,631 --> 00:23:34,923 Oh, Gwart. No, no, no! That's too much sun. 557 00:23:36,422 --> 00:23:38,297 -(buzzing stops) -Oh my God. 558 00:23:39,214 --> 00:23:41,005 This is Gwart? 559 00:23:41,089 --> 00:23:42,881 -Richard... -(scoffs) 560 00:23:42,964 --> 00:23:45,714 -This is who you're walking away for? -Richard, do not. 561 00:23:45,798 --> 00:23:47,673 She's your new little code girlfriend? 562 00:23:47,756 --> 00:23:50,047 -Don't. -This, uh-- 563 00:23:50,130 --> 00:23:52,255 -Don't. -This googly-eyed... 564 00:23:52,339 --> 00:23:54,881 -No, no, no, no... -Yoo-hoo drinking-- 565 00:23:54,964 --> 00:23:56,422 -No! -Oh my God. 566 00:23:56,506 --> 00:23:58,756 Oh, okay, okay, okay, look, I'm sorry! 567 00:23:58,839 --> 00:24:00,130 -No. -All right. 568 00:24:00,214 --> 00:24:02,547 I oughta knock your teeth, you bitch-made motherfucker. 569 00:24:02,631 --> 00:24:04,673 -I-I-I... I didn't mean it. -(glass shatters) 570 00:24:04,756 --> 00:24:06,005 I was state-raised! 571 00:24:06,089 --> 00:24:07,798 You think I'm scared to catch a case 572 00:24:07,881 --> 00:24:10,005 -of some bullshit?! -I-I'm sorry, Jared! 573 00:24:10,089 --> 00:24:11,881 I didn't mean it, okay? I'm sorry, Gwart. 574 00:24:11,964 --> 00:24:14,339 -I didn't mean it! -You keep her name out of your skanky little mouth, 575 00:24:14,422 --> 00:24:15,923 you little, little bitch! 576 00:24:16,005 --> 00:24:18,631 Hey! Hey! Hey! This is a place of business-- 577 00:24:18,714 --> 00:24:20,172 Oh my God. Don't shoot me! 578 00:24:20,255 --> 00:24:21,589 -Jared! -(BB clinks) 579 00:24:21,673 --> 00:24:24,422 -Jared! Aah! -Dope-led, peckerwood motherfucker! 580 00:24:24,506 --> 00:24:27,255 -Richard: Jared! Jared, no! -Get checked in, hoe! 581 00:24:27,339 --> 00:24:29,422 (banging) 582 00:24:29,506 --> 00:24:31,130 Oh, Jesus! 583 00:24:31,214 --> 00:24:34,464 Jared: You wanna dance on the blacktop, homie?! 584 00:24:34,547 --> 00:24:36,714 You did this, Richard! 585 00:24:37,881 --> 00:24:39,381 -(BB thwacks) -Aah! 586 00:24:39,464 --> 00:24:41,130 Ow, what the fuck? 587 00:24:41,214 --> 00:24:43,547 ♪ ♪ 588 00:24:44,964 --> 00:24:48,089 Mr. Gilfoyle! You wanted to see me before I left? 589 00:24:48,172 --> 00:24:50,381 Yes, Tracy, I did. 590 00:24:50,464 --> 00:24:54,172 I wanted you to be here when I push my entire backlog of code. 591 00:24:54,255 --> 00:24:57,798 You finished all of it? In just 24 hours? 592 00:24:57,881 --> 00:25:00,881 I did, all by myself. 593 00:25:02,589 --> 00:25:03,714 (clicks) 594 00:25:05,589 --> 00:25:07,714 I'll take that apology now. 595 00:25:07,798 --> 00:25:10,881 Mr. Gilfoyle, you said that I had to choose. 596 00:25:10,964 --> 00:25:14,005 You said I could have it fast or I could have it right, 597 00:25:14,089 --> 00:25:17,214 but I just got it fast and right, 598 00:25:17,297 --> 00:25:19,631 and all I had to do was threaten your manhood 599 00:25:19,714 --> 00:25:21,547 by assigning you other coders. 600 00:25:21,631 --> 00:25:23,422 It worked at seven other companies, 601 00:25:23,506 --> 00:25:25,714 and it obviously worked here. 602 00:25:26,255 --> 00:25:28,172 We're back on schedule! 603 00:25:28,255 --> 00:25:30,005 Now, why would I be sorry about that. 604 00:25:30,089 --> 00:25:33,214 ♪ ♪ 605 00:25:33,297 --> 00:25:35,381 I respect your skills. 606 00:25:36,089 --> 00:25:37,130 Thank you. 607 00:25:37,214 --> 00:25:39,297 See you in the morning. 608 00:25:42,964 --> 00:25:44,839 Maximo: And now, we are both holding 609 00:25:44,923 --> 00:25:46,381 -a whiskey. -Yes. 610 00:25:46,464 --> 00:25:48,589 Um, Maximo, I wanna apologize 611 00:25:48,673 --> 00:25:50,214 for coming over here unannounced. 612 00:25:50,297 --> 00:25:52,130 And I wanna do this deal with you, 613 00:25:52,214 --> 00:25:54,047 but... Jesus-- 614 00:25:54,130 --> 00:25:56,923 Richard, you have some concerns because of my family. 615 00:25:57,005 --> 00:25:58,506 I mean... yeah. 616 00:25:59,089 --> 00:26:01,422 Richard, do you see these photographs? 617 00:26:01,506 --> 00:26:04,673 Now, these people, a lot of them children, 618 00:26:04,756 --> 00:26:07,547 used to work for my father in my family's mines. 619 00:26:07,631 --> 00:26:09,422 Now, I keep them here as a reminder 620 00:26:09,506 --> 00:26:11,547 of the many, many mistakes my father made. 621 00:26:11,631 --> 00:26:14,464 I want to fix those mistakes, Richard. 622 00:26:14,547 --> 00:26:16,923 By investing in you and your company, 623 00:26:17,005 --> 00:26:18,506 I'll be able to start doing that. 624 00:26:18,589 --> 00:26:19,881 Do you really believe that? 625 00:26:19,964 --> 00:26:22,255 Richard, we are going to change the world, you and I. 626 00:26:22,339 --> 00:26:25,297 -(thuds) -Shit! What was that? 627 00:26:25,381 --> 00:26:28,214 Ah, the birds. You know, they're attracted to the tree, 628 00:26:28,297 --> 00:26:29,798 so sometimes, you know, kapffft! 629 00:26:29,881 --> 00:26:31,756 (laughs) What are you gonna do? 630 00:26:32,339 --> 00:26:35,756 -To rectifying the mistakes of my father. -Sure. Yeah. 631 00:26:35,839 --> 00:26:37,839 The fool who allowed the workers to unionize 632 00:26:37,923 --> 00:26:39,798 and ask for higher wages 633 00:26:39,881 --> 00:26:41,839 and more expensive hospitals. 634 00:26:41,923 --> 00:26:44,339 -We-- -Uh, sorry. What was that? 635 00:26:44,422 --> 00:26:46,589 Yes. My grandfather, he built a great fortune, 636 00:26:46,673 --> 00:26:49,381 but then my idiot father almost gave it all away. 637 00:26:49,464 --> 00:26:51,589 But not now, though. Oh no. 638 00:26:51,673 --> 00:26:54,464 Now, I mine copper, cobalt and diamonds, 639 00:26:54,547 --> 00:26:56,589 and now, thanks to you, 640 00:26:56,673 --> 00:26:58,673 data. Gracias. 641 00:26:59,881 --> 00:27:01,756 Uh, no. No, what? 642 00:27:01,839 --> 00:27:03,798 -No, we do not-- -(bird clunks) 643 00:27:03,881 --> 00:27:05,047 Oh my God! 644 00:27:05,130 --> 00:27:06,422 Uh... 645 00:27:06,506 --> 00:27:07,923 No, we... 646 00:27:08,005 --> 00:27:11,047 We will not mine user data. 647 00:27:11,130 --> 00:27:12,589 I was very clear about that. 648 00:27:12,673 --> 00:27:14,005 -But you do. -(thuds) 649 00:27:14,089 --> 00:27:15,214 Richard, did you not tell me 650 00:27:15,297 --> 00:27:17,714 when we were sitting on my tree, bonding, 651 00:27:17,798 --> 00:27:19,631 that there is a man in your network right now, 652 00:27:19,714 --> 00:27:22,798 using a tool, that you built, in order to mine user data? 653 00:27:22,881 --> 00:27:25,381 No. That is coming to an end. That doesn't happen anymore. 654 00:27:25,464 --> 00:27:28,506 -(bird clunks) -Richard, please. Cheers. 655 00:27:28,589 --> 00:27:30,130 To our future endeavors together. 656 00:27:30,214 --> 00:27:31,506 Maximo... 657 00:27:31,589 --> 00:27:35,172 we will never collect and monetize user data. 658 00:27:35,255 --> 00:27:36,631 Ever. 659 00:27:36,714 --> 00:27:40,130 Then why would I give you one billion dollars, Richard? 660 00:27:40,214 --> 00:27:42,839 Look at me. I am not a fool like my father. 661 00:27:42,923 --> 00:27:44,214 (bird clunks) 662 00:27:44,297 --> 00:27:47,798 You are turning this into a dick-measuring contest. 663 00:27:47,881 --> 00:27:50,923 Please don't, because I assure you, 664 00:27:51,005 --> 00:27:54,214 it will be I who measures the most. 665 00:27:55,714 --> 00:27:57,172 Are-are you threatening me? 666 00:27:57,255 --> 00:27:58,506 Take my money, Richard. 667 00:27:58,589 --> 00:28:00,881 It'll be very good for you, 668 00:28:00,964 --> 00:28:02,255 and very good for me. 669 00:28:02,339 --> 00:28:05,547 But if you do not take my money, Richard... 670 00:28:05,923 --> 00:28:08,923 oh, it will be very bad for you. 671 00:28:10,297 --> 00:28:11,881 (bird clunks, splashes) 672 00:28:11,964 --> 00:28:15,255 ("She Got the Devil in Her" by Buddy Guy playing) 673 00:28:19,381 --> 00:28:21,464 ♪ ♪ 674 00:28:41,798 --> 00:28:44,923 ♪ ♪ 675 00:29:00,339 --> 00:29:04,005 ♪ You know I talk to my baby ♪ 676 00:29:04,089 --> 00:29:07,214 ♪ Like a mother talk to her kid ♪ 677 00:29:07,297 --> 00:29:10,089 ♪ You know I love that woman ♪ 678 00:29:10,172 --> 00:29:14,047 ♪ But I just can't keep it hid ♪ 679 00:29:14,130 --> 00:29:16,464 ♪ She got the devil in her ♪ 680 00:29:18,923 --> 00:29:20,089 ♪ Yes ♪ 681 00:29:20,172 --> 00:29:22,631 ♪ That woman got the devil in her... ♪ 682 00:29:30,673 --> 00:29:32,506 Richard, it's Maximo. 683 00:29:32,589 --> 00:29:33,881 (CHUCKLES) We are on the phone. 684 00:29:34,172 --> 00:29:36,381 Let me tell you what is going to happen to you next. 685 00:29:37,005 --> 00:29:37,964 (RETCHES) 686 00:29:39,005 --> 00:29:41,673 All I wanted to do was be a golden millionaire. 687 00:29:41,756 --> 00:29:43,839 A millionaire that gets peed on? 688 00:29:44,172 --> 00:29:45,923 I could see you making half that happen. 689 00:29:46,172 --> 00:29:47,839 Can I be honest with you for once? 690 00:29:48,089 --> 00:29:50,047 For once? You're my attorney. 691 00:29:50,130 --> 00:29:51,130 You're out of options. 692 00:29:51,631 --> 00:29:53,089 -DINESH CHUGTAI: Holy shit. -MONICA HALL: We could buy Hooli. 693 00:29:53,422 --> 00:29:54,631 Take your marks. 694 00:29:57,089 --> 00:29:58,005 (GUNSHOT) 695 00:30:02,381 --> 00:30:03,589 I still got it, Hoover.